He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I wear drunk well.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
