Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
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we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
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I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He shit in the fireplace
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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