It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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