Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Randomize
