he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
