you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
