OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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