Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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