Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
