No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
