Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
