that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
