Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
