haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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