he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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