i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
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