I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
