I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
