I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
