I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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