So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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