Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
