the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
