just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
