I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
