ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
