I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
