so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
