seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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