That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
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he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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