worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
