The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize