direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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