I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
