Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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