I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
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He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
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I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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