How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
