Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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