You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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