So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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