You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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