god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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