sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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