So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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