whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
