love makes seman taste better
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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