So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
