ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
