I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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