I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
