HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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