just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
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